Here we are a month now into “shelter in place”. I’m thinking of you all as we continue to navigate this new territory, and I’d love to continue our heartfelt convo from a few weeks ago.
Today I want to talk about the “shoulds”.
You know the…
“I should be starting my new business.”
“I ought to be losing the weight.”
“I should finish up that project I’ve been meaning to do forever.”
“I need to make good on my vision for my life and this is the time to do it!”
Are you beating yourself up about all the things you “should” be doing right now? If so, you’re not alone. It’s so easy to fall into that trap.
We live in a society where we’re programmed in many ways to have these “should”thoughts of feeling like “we should be doing more”… a society that values productivity above most else, and since we were little, often we’ve been conditioned to believe that if we aren’t DOING, we’re falling short.
Today and beyond, I’d like to invite you to consider trying on a new perspective and choice… and that is to consider that “tending to your vision(s)” right now and keeping the embers warm so to speak during this pause, doesn’t necessarily have to have anything to do with constant DOING…. that one of the most important things I feel you can do right now is be with yourself and your vision(s) in a whole new way.
Radical, right? I know!
Let’s try this on with a mini little meditation/activity.
I invite you to pause for a moment.
Drop in with yourself. Take a deep breath. Take another.
Connect in with the thought, “What is the vision I had for myself before this pandemic began or even as we’ve been in this shelter in place?” Allow that vision to emerge. Keep breathing. Sit in the delicious feeling of that vision and allow it to permeate your body. Breathe it alive.
So, for example, perhaps the vision is to offer your Self more space for listening to your intuition and acting on it.
When you feel into this vision, what is the feeling you experience?
Ease? Joy? Calm? Excitement? Something else?
Whatever that feeling is, be with it for a moment. This is the flame inside of you, and it is important to tend to during this time. Consider that the most valuable thing you could do right now is to be with that feeling. Consider that tending to your vision(s) of how you want to connect/live/be in the world and holding the flame of your desire could be as simple as connecting in with this place inside you each day. Consider that you get to practice choosing what you’ll do each day from this feeling rather than from the voice that says “I should.”
All those “should” voices in our head? They’re nothing new, and they may not be going anywhere anytime soon. What we have right now is an opportunity to cultivate an even deeper listening of ourselves, and it requires that we actively resist the urge to fill the space with all our should-ing and all our excess doing.
What would it be like to witness yourself in the “should” and choose not to act on it? What would it be like to practice reconnecting to the core of your vision instead and taking action from a genuine desire? I’m not saying this will be easy. It’s a practice to be sure. You’re worth it though, and I’d love to hear what you get from giving this a try… to keep the embers warm on your visions for self, all while lining up with your essential timing, pacing, and rhythm for bringing action to that vision. To release to should’s and replace them with an honoring of you.
P.S. If you missed my last post… you can read it here.